My sister Debbie had been living on her own for several years and once during a phone conversation she revealed to me: “The American Dream is not owning your own home…it’s owning your own washer and dryer.”
Debbie doesn’t often impart what can be called words of wisdom (she’s a little shy in many respects) but she hit the nail on the head with that one. As an individual who despised dragging my dirty laundry to the laundromat (primarily because I had limited transportation) during my years of exile in Morgantown, WV, there was no greater relief when I moved into an apartment complex that had its own laundry facilities on the premises. (I then encountered a new series of problems, namely getting hold of a roll of quarters every week.)
When I made the move to Morgantown, I lived with my best friend from high school and her husband for about a year—they had a washer and dryer, and I used theirs, but what they preferred to do was let every item of clothing they and their kids owned get dirty and go to a laundromat across town that also sold beer and pepperoni rolls. Pretty novel concept…except they spent more on beer than they did on the actual laundry—an expense I certainly couldn’t afford.
After moving out and into my own digs, I was fortunate to find an apartment where the laundromat was a short walk up one hill and down another (a convenient series of back streets)…but winters proved to be a bitch, particularly since I was convinced the city took special care to ice down the back streets during inclement weather. (“Check out that bozo taking his laundry to the laundromat…is he going to be in for a surprise!”) But that laundromat closed down within a few years, and so I ended up having to take a cab to the next available establishment.
I’m babbling on about this because my sister Kat told me last Friday that she’s investing in an energy efficient washer-dryer combo from Lowe’s, and she’s bequeathing me her old W/D. As it stands now, whenever I have to do laundry I end up dragging it over to her place…so it will be a positive boon to be able to do clothes without venturing outside the house. The combo that she’s buying costs a pretty penny (modesty prevents me from revealing the total amount), and when my father heard of this purchase he went through the roof, screaming: “I can get you both a washer and a dryer for $300!” To which I told Kat: “Bullshit…if he could do that, I’d have one already.” It was then that Kat explained he’d left out the qualifier “that work” in his declaration…so I felt a little foolish, since I should have factored that into the equation.
Kat is justifying this big honkin’ expense because the ‘rents (drum roll please) have sold the house (cue confetti and streamers) and will be arriving in mid-August to begin their new life in Athens. Let the wacky complications ensue!