Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Climb every mtn

Last Friday, my mother phones to inform me that she’s going to make a run to Publix and asks if I needed anything. Since there’s a Wachovia (or in the well-honed wit of my sister Kat, “Walk-All-Over-You”) branch right by the supermarket, I told I’d go with her because I needed to deposit a check into my account…and take a quick glance around the store in the process.

Fortunately for me, I had foresight enough to check Publix’s weekly ad and noticed that they were having a sale on Pepsi and Pepsi-product twelve-packs, 4 for $11. For a while, I was pretty good about cutting down on my soft-drink intake (if I drank any at all it was usually of the diet or no-carb variety) but I must come clean and admit that I have backslid considerably since moving to Athens. As such, I picked up some Pepsi, Caffeine-Free Pepsi, Mountain Dew and Sunkist during our Publix sojourn.

At least…I thought it was Mountain Dew.

I cracked open a 12-ounce can the other day and casually glanced at the label…to my chagrin, one of my favorite none-too-good-for-me beverages has changed its name…to this:

WTF? What’s with the “Mtn Dew?” Has the age of text messaging made soft drink companies lazy or something?

So I gleaned from Wikipedia that the Mountain Dew folk (Mountain Dew, by the way, is the fourth-largest selling soda pop in the good ol’ U. S. of A, preceded by Diet Coke at #3, Pepsi at #2 and Coca-Cola Classic in the top spot) decided to make this change in October of last year, “re-branding” their projects by the end of 2008.

I don’t know about you, but this kind of cheeses me off.

I was a Mountain Dew drinker for a long time, ostensibly because of its high caffeine content (I only drink coffee on rare occasions, like to top off a really good meal), and I’m old enough to remember when it was advertised with its familiar “hillbilly” logo. But I guess when you get to be the #4-ranked soda in the nation, you’re forced to monkey around with your product on occasion to keep people from buying the product. They’ve got all kinds of Dew variations out there: Code Red, Diet Code Red, Live Wire, Baja Blast—the one I still have trouble wrapping my mind around is Caffeine-Free Mountain Dew. (I thought that was the purpose of drinking Mountain Dew in the first place.)

And now it’s no longer Mountain Dew…but “mtn dew.” (First, there is a mountain…then there is no mountain…then there is…) The ramifications of such a “re-branding” have yet to be felt, I fear. Next thing you know, you’ll be requesting to hear “Mtn of Love” or “River Deep, Mtn High” on oldies radio stations. People will be putting movies like Spencer’s Mtn (1963) and Brokeback Mtn (2005) into their Netflix queues. Mass hysteria!

You kids just get off my lawn now. I’ll probably be ruminating about this the rest of the day.


Anonymous said...

The reasoning behind the name change for Mountain Dew is so logical, I'm surprised it passed the writer. In this era of the very, very far religious right, the word "mountain" as almost the same as "mounting" and that, of course, refers to the animalistic positions of s-x. Oh, those three evil letters. Imagine how drinking Mo-----tain Dew (do?) is corrupting the vastly ignorant youth of America. I salute the Pepsi Cola Co. for their untiring efforts to save this country from the rapid fall into Hell.

jdwatts said...

I think it's yet another example of how the evil shorthand of "texting" is overtaking the culture of the written word. "Vowels, syllables, who needs them?"

DMC said...

First commenter has it wrong.

MOUNTAIN Dew is too hillbilly -- ie hick, unsophisticated, uncultured.

You know, those gun-toting, Bible thumpin', clinging to their guns and religion folks?

Sophisticated liberals wouldn't be caught dead drinking anything that has that fly-over state cachet.

Therefore the shortened, less obvious "Mtn." Much like Kentucky Fried Chicken has been KFC for years now.

Don't want the restaurant to evoke memories of southern plantations and the old folks at home, rockin' on the front porch listening to the music from the slave quarters.