Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Thrilling Days of Convalescence (Part 2 in a series)

I know—two posts in two days…who’d-a thunk? (I must have more energy than I thought.)

So I’m in my room at the hospital and the attending nurse is assigning me a bunch of meds that consist of potassium pills that are so gi-normous I halfway expect to leap out of bed and do 1:15 around the track (they give these to elderly people, by the way—I don’t know how they manage to swallow them, they’re so huge) when this other nurse walks into the room. She works at the hospital, though she’s not on duty right now, but she takes one look at me and practically swoons. “I remember when they brought you in here—my God, you look tremendous!

I should point out here that I have never been described in my entire lifetime as looking “tremendous” but I decided to take the compliment as it came. The attending nurse then decides to burst the bubble by telling her colleague that she’s thinking of someone else who was in this room.

The visiting nurse takes a beat, and then remarks: “Well, when I see that other patient I still think he won’t look half-as-good as you…”

Just an attempt to add a little levity to all this somber hospital talk, by the way. My family tells me I was nothing but one laugh after another when they brought me in because my electrolytes were so out of whack. Apparently I threatened to drown my sister Kat at one point if she didn’t stop trying to stop me from pulling the IV out of my arm (I had convinced myself that I had some used coffee grounds in my pocket)—which would have been quite a feat, since she has almost as many lifesaving badges/citations/awards as Tom Sutpen has seen movies.

The funniest incident involves my sister-in-law, who came by the hospital to see me but unfortunately walked into the wrong room. Without breaking stride, she started fluffing the patient’s pillow and started a spiel about welcoming her to the hospital and hoping she enjoyed her stay.

(Okay—I exaggerated on the pillow-fluffing part. But she really did shift into Welcome Wagon-mode.)

In the meantime, I received an e-mail from cub reporter Larry Shell re: the Sam’s Club status of Timeless Media’s first season The Virginian release that he’s graciously allowed me to share with you:

Went to my local Sam's Club today to snag THE VIRGINIAN, Season 1, Parts 1 and 2. Was very surprised to see Season 2, Parts 1 and 2 were ALSO available. They're all $19.88 each.

Amazon has a complete Season 1 tin set for $71.99 and its not coming out until May 25 soooooo $19.98 each is one heck of a deal!

Larry also goes on to say:

Timeless is putting out some interesting stuff. I'm intrigued by a couple of these but can't find
samples on YouTube to check out on
Frontier Circus and Whispering Smith specifically.

Frontier Circus

Whispering Smith with Audie Murphy!

Oregon Trail

Still no news re: surgery status—my mother called the surgeon’s office yesterday but they’ve yet to call her back. In the meantime, I thought I would provoke a little discussion by asking this question?

“What beverage would you recommend that I can drink on a regular basis without fear of it seriously threatening my health? (excepting the usual suspects, like water)”

I’ve pretty much sworn off all and any sugary soda/pop/soft drinks with the exception of a few items: Fresca and Sprite Zero (Mom adds just a touch of cranberry juice to give this a little kick.) I’ve tried the Fanta Zero but it tastes like water with orange food coloring. I also drink a little Crystal Light from time to time—it’s a shame they stopped selling it in the pre-mixed bottles. If anyone has any suggestions as to any type of refreshment that I might be missing out on, feel free to use the comments section for your own nefarious purposes.

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Stacia said...

If you can handle the caffeine, brown brewed tea is always good. If you don't mind mixing a pitcher of it, Country Time sugar free pink lemonade is downright addictive. I loved the Crystal Light cranberry flavor, too, but haven't seen it in years.

Tom said...

Green River!!!

Bill the Splut said...

You didn't really say what you can't drink. Given that, I say fruit juice. Cranberry and pomegranate are my favorites, and very healthy. Also, tea, pretty much any fresh-brewed kind (avoid bottled ice teas, as they're usually corn syrup); Stash English breakfast tea and good old Red Rose are quite satisfying, and available as decaf, and also good for you, antioxidant-wise.

Bill the Splut said...

On rereading your post, you're drinking soda. That stuff's mainly high fructose corn syrup, and that's just diabetes in a bottle. Stay away from that, period, and forever.

Tom said...

They have diet Green River, too.