Thursday, June 30, 2011

“Don't make a fuss, dear...I'll have your spam...I love it...I'm having spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, baked beans, spam, spam and spam...”


The old spam filter here at Thrilling Days of Yesteryear has really been earning its keep the past day or so thanks to the tenacious individual above, who answers to “llq” and has been commenting up a storm on past posts, trying to turn my pretty head with blatantly shameless flattery like “Possibly the most amazing blog I read all year!” (you really need to get around the Internets more) and “Vivacious Blog – Full life and energy” (odd…I’m still experiencing a tired, rundown feeling).  The one comment that Mr. or Mrs. llq keeps posting that has me a bit stumped reads “You have some sth~~”—and if anyone out there in Blogland can explain to me what the hell that means, I welcome your interpretation.  (I mean, if this “sth” is on my shirt I should probably go and put on a clean one.)

So you may be wondering “What have I…what have I…what have I done to deserve this?”  (Although that could be Dusty Springfield and the Pet Shop Boys playing on my Winamp.)  Well, this devoted fandom from my latest groupie apparently involves a little quid pro quo—after each one of these stirring blog testimonials llq clumsily inserts links to merchandise: “vintage” wedding dresses with “lace sleeves,” Christian Louboutin fur boots (I don’t even known who in blue blazes Louboutin is…I’m wearing a Daffy Duck T-shirt with "sth" on it, ferchrissake), cheap mobile phones, etc.  There’s even a link in their comments to “mermaid wedding dresses” and, again, because I am fashion-impaired the only motivation for me to be interested in something like that would be if the contents of the dress contained Glynis Johns (Miranda, Mad About Men).

I just thought I’d take a minute or two out of my frightfully busy schedule to poke merciless fun at this bananahead and to simply say “Knock it off.”  I admire your persistent attempts to hawk your spam-encrusted line of clothing here at TDOY, but not all of your adulation for my blog is caught by Blogger’s filter…and because I have to physically delete it myself it’s really getting on my wick.  If you’re harboring the delusion that I’m going to eventually throw my hands up in surrender and say “Oh, what’s the harm in letting poor llq tout a bridal jacket or two?” you need to ask your nurse for a little extra medication.

As llq might say: “I agree with many points.  But in some areas, I feel we need to be more aggressive.  Just my opinion.  Love ya.”  Right back atcha, babe.

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7 comments:

ClassicBecky said...

My Dad fought in WWII and after his experience with Spam for 3 years, he never wanted it in the house... I was not only raised Catholic, I was raised to hate Spam. Even with eggs. Even in a meatloaf you can still taste it. Talk about by-products! God knows what is in there. Dad always said chicken lips and ... well I can't say the rest in a public forum!

I can't even guess what sth is. Maybe llq mean sht and just typed it wrong. Puts a whole new light on he/she's opinion of your stuff! LOL!

Ivan G. Shreve, Jr. said...

Well, one of my oldest and dearest friends from my halcyon high school days saw my post via Facebook this morning and did a little Internets sleuthing:

‎"sth" according to Wikipedia is "A nonstandard abbreviation for the phrase "so the heck" prominently used by gamers" Hummm it begs the question, can you give me a situation where you would use that in a sentence? Answer: Ivan's Blog of course! :) Also from Wikipedia "A nonstandard abbreviation for the word "something", familiar to users of English learner's dictionaries". So there you go..... :)

And now that our lesson is finished for today, let's go ripped at recess.

Your dad's experiences with "spam" are not uncommon here at TDOY; when I have explored this subject in the past a number of people often opine that past dining of the questionable meat has made them sworn off ever touching it again. I will fully confess that I like Spam--my mother usually prepares it as a breakfast entree, fried to a golden...well, it's not brown but you sort of get the idea.

Rachel said...

Your adventures in Spamalot made me laugh out loud.

I'm still not translating that "sth" correctly. According to your definitions, it's either "You have some so the heck" or "You have some something." "Sth" is the route to madness! Madness on a spam sandwich!

KickinAssTakingNames said...

This made me laugh hard. I thank ye.

Stacia said...

I am not a fan of the persistent human-powered spammers. They are all over the really huge websites like TMZ, and for some reason they love Technoknob but not SBBN.

Dad was in WWII and Spam was not allowed in the house. Neither was what he delightfully called "shit on a shingle." Can I say that on the radio? Well, I just did whether I was allowed or not. Dad lost a ton of weight during the war because the food was horrible, but he was stationed on a ship with soldiers who grew up in the deep back woods of the Ozarks and who loved the food. They thought Spam was like unto the second coming.

Pam said...

Holy crap. I've been found out.

Ivan G. Shreve, Jr. said...

Holy crap. I've been found out.

And I forgot the first rule of Murder, She Wrote: the guest star is always the guilty party.