Thrilling Days of Yesteryear: Almost the Truth—The Lawyer's Cut

Saturday, July 14, 2012

The Green Hornet – Chapter 8: Dead or Alive


OUR STORY SO FAR: Britt Reid (Gordon Jones), disguised as The Green Hornet, captures Sligby (Eddie Dunn), the murderer of Charles Roberts (Kenneth Harlan), then trails the trucking racketeers and surprises two of them about to destroy a trainload of perishables.  The racketeers attempt to escape in a truck, but The Hornet boards the truck and battles one of the men, while the other races the truck toward a bridge to get help from two of his pals.  But his pals, to prevent a rival truck crossing the bridge to make deliveries, have weakened the bridge supports, and the speeding truck…

…collapses the bridge and plummets into the ravine below.  But worry ye not, dear readers…our hero escaped in the nick of time because both he and ineffectual henchman Dean (Walter McGrail) tumbled off the back of the vehicle just moments before it went racing over the doomed bridge.  (The man behind the wheel, noted attorney Andrew T. Thug [Ralph Dunn], had already bailed out of the truck’s cab in the previous installment, presumably to hench another day.)  Faithful valet Kato (Keye Luke) pulls up in the Black Beauty and attends to his bloodied but unbowed boss:

KATO: Are you hurt badly?

“No, I’m hurt surprisingly well.  Idiot…”

HORNET: No…but I think the man I was fighting with is
KATO: I saw some men on the other side…signaling to stop the truck before it went onto the bridge…
HORNET: They were the men Sligby sent to wreck the bridge!  Where’s the car?
KATO: This way…

And…they just leave henchman Dean lying on the ground.  Oh, sure…he might be “hurt badly,” and taking him to get medical attention might allow the Hornet to later pump him for information about the bad guys you’re after—but then he’d have wrapped this up in eight chapters, and he's contracted for thirteen.  Well, seeing as in the next scene we see more stock footage of proles at work at The Daily Sentinel and then this banner headline:


Maybe the Hornet had a deadline to meet.  Outside of publisher Reid’s office, secretary Lenore “Casey” Case (Anne Nagel) reads the story out loud for the benefit of those of us who’ve noticed that the headline and what’s actually printed as the story don’t precisely match.  Ace reporter Jasper Jenks (Phillip Trent) is leaning up against her desk.

CASEY: “…bound hand and foot with the seal of The Green Hornet in his hand, documents found in Sligby’s pockets are believed to be sufficient evidence to convict him of the murder…”
JENKS: You don’t have to read it to me, Casey—I wrote it…and boy, was it a scoop!
CASEY: If you wrote it, why do you keep calling the Hornet a crook?  Why not find out what the man is after, instead of classing him with hoodlums and racketeers?
REID (entering the office while snapping his fingers): That’s the stuff, Miss Case…what do you suggest we better do?
CASEY: Find out who the Green Hornet is!

Meanwhile, in the office of brains heavy Curtis Monroe (Cy Kendall), Monroe is echoing that very same thought as henchmen Andy, Dean (he’s okay!) and Corey (Gene Rizzi) gather ‘round:

MONROE: Find out who the Green Hornet is!  We had a dozen paying rackets and the police couldn’t touch us…now the Hornet steps in!
ANDY: And he not only breaks the rackets, but gets the men that run them!  Markheim and Grant dead…Mortinson and Rockford in jail…and now they got a murder charge against Sligby with enough evidence to hang him!
MONROE: Sligby won’t squeal on the syndicate…

I don’t think a scenario like the following would ever occur, but if I were in a syndicate and had been captured by the long arm of the law and facing a murder rap…I’d sing like a freakin’ canary.  Just sayin’.

MONROE: …but unless you men track down the Hornet there won’t be any syndicate…
COREY: Dean and I have tracked him down more than once…and been lucky to live to tell about it!
DEAN: Look, Monroe…every time the Hornet strikes, The Sentinel has the information first…think there’s any connection?
MONROE: With The Sentinel offering a $1,000 reward for The Hornet, dead or alive?  Don’t be a fool!

Speaking of fools, with the scene shifting back to Reid’s office, we find his bodyguard and the serial’s comedy relief, Michael Axford (Wade Boteler), bounding into his boss’ chambers and looking quite natty in a nice suit.

AXFORD: Look, Reid…I got somethin’… (He starts to feel around in his pockets)
REID: It must be a date, from the way you’re dolled up…
AXFORD: Dolled up?  Sure, that’s what I wanted to talk to you about…a dollar-and-a-quarter it cost me to have this suit pressed…six months ago, the price was seventy-five cents
REID: The price of labor has gone up…
AXFORD: You mean the price of protection has gone up…look at this…



AXFORD: I found that in me coat pocket when I brought the suit home…
REID (after a pause): We can’t print this…it’s unsigned…
AXFORD: Ah, yes…but I could interview this guy Lavonson…
REID: But even if it were true, he wouldn’t dare talk…but I’ll keep it on file in case something turns up…
AXFORD: That’s right, laddie…we’d better find it, sure…

Axford gets up and while he’s readying himself to leave the office, goes through his pockets one more time…then snaps his fingers, remembering he already gave Reid the paper.  The Sentinel’s publisher furrows his brow in thought as the scene dissolves to his penthouse apartment, where he finishes putting on his Green Hornet accoutrements.

KATO: Your gun, Mr. Britt…
HORNET: Thanks, Kato…perhaps The Green Hornet can persuade Mr. Lavonson to tell some things he wouldn’t dare tell the police!

Cue Flight of the Bumblebee!  The Hornet and Kato duck down the secret passage to the garage next door, start up the Black Beauty and they’re off to the races!  But they’re not the only ones who’ll be paying J. Lavonson (Robert Brister) a social call.  Outside an apartment building, a female photographer (Myrtis Crinley) appears to be waiting for someone to pick her up.  Discouraged, she turns and starts to go back into the building, but a car pulls up and behind the wheel is Axford, who toots the horn.  The photographer isn’t identified right off, but will later be revealed to be an employee of The Sentinel, “Clicker” Bennie.

CLICKER (to Axford through the passenger seat window): I’ve been waiting twenty minutes, Man of Action… what’s on your so-called mind?
AXFORD: Sure, I’m givin’ you a chance for a front page picture…a man named Lavonson!
CLICKER (getting into Axford’s car): Is he important?
AXFORD: After I’ve interviewed him, he’ll be the most important man in town!

So we find the individual who’ll soon be the most important man in town in his apartment, a decidedly nervous sort.  The phone rings, and Lavonson answers it—the man on the other end will be later identified as Lynch (Guy Usher), one of the many tentacles in the octopus known as Crime, Inc.

LAVONSON: Hello?
LYNCH: That you, Lavonson?  Well, listen…your protection money hasn’t been paid this month…
LAVONSON: But I haven’t got the money…business is bad…our customers are all kicking at the raise in prices…


As Lavonson continues to explain to Lynch that his son has been put away again, and that Mrs. Dalrymple can hardly move her poor fingers (and don’t forget Gilberto’s war wound), The Hornet and Kato pull up in an alley near the apartment building.  It is, in fact, the very same alley in which they parked in Chapter 3, when they came a-calling on Josephine Weaver Allen (Ann Doran)…and the Hornet even leaps up on the fire escape in precisely the same fashion.  This would seem to suggest that either the filmmakers just recycled the previous footage (more than likely), or that Lavonson and Weaver lived in the same apartment building, accessible only by fire escape (not quite as likely).

LYNCH: Never mind the excuses…you remember what happened to the others who didn’t pay…
LAVONSON: Give me another day…I’ll raise the money, Lynch…somehow

Lavonson is surprised by the sudden appearance of The Green Hornet, who leaps through an open window (kind of Lavonson’s fault for leaving it open, really) and barks: “Give me that phone!”  Lavonson immediately slams the receiver down.

HORNET (picking the receiver back up): Hello?  Hello?  (To Lavonson) Who was on that phone?
LAVONSON: Who are you?


The Hornet pulls out one of his calling cards…and yes, I know it’s a bit more dramatic that way but I don’t know why he just doesn’t dispense with all that foofrah and say “I’m the Hornet, baby!”

LAVONSON: The Green Hornet!
HORNET: Yes…who were you talking to?
LAVONSON: Er…no…someone had the wrong number…
HORNET: Don’t lie, Lavonson!  I know you and others are paying for protection!

Outside Lavonson’s apartment building (which is definitely not the same as Ms. Weaver-Allen’s…so it would appear it was recycling after all), Axford and Bennie pull up in Michael’s ride.

AXFORD: This is the place…wait here ‘til I see whether the fellow will talk a-t’all…
CLICKER: You’ll probably scare him off before I get a lens on him…

Axford gets out of his car, and starts toward the building.  Back in Lavonson’s apartment:

HORNET: I want to know who collects that money and the name of the man who sends him!
LAVONSON: And why should I tell you?  You’d hijack him, and I’d have to pay twice!
HORNET: Then you admit you’re paying!
LAVONSON: I…I admit nothing

Something about the way actor Brister delivers that last line gave me the giggles.  The buzzer to Lavonson’s front door rings several times, and the Hornet orders him to see who it is.  Opening the door, we find…yes, you-know-who.

AXFORD: Good evenin’, Mr. Lavonson…I’m Michael Axford, representin’ the Daily Sentinel…I’m here for a little interview…


Uh-oh…

AXFORD: Now then…a buck and a quarter you charged me for pressin’ the last suit I sent ya…
LAVONSON: I’ve nothing to say to reporters…
AXFORD: Aw, come on now, Mr. Lavonson…sure, The Sentinel wants to help you…and you know, there’s no one here but the two of us… (Entering the apartment and closing the front door, Michael sees the Hornet)  And the ghost of St. Patrick…the Green Hornet!

That would make four people…wouldn’t it?

AXFORD: So it was you that was collectin’ the blood money for the rackets, you murderin’ pirate… (He lunges toward the Hornet)
HORNET (brandishing his gas gun): Stay where you are!

Now…this next scene is a little perplexing.  The Hornet turns his back on Axford, ordering Lavonson to come clean with the information.  Since the Hornet is really Britt Reid in disguise, he’s well aware that Axford is a consummate bungler and about as threatening as a stuffed animal.  But still, turning his back on the guy is kind of idiotic, so when Michael smashes a chair across the Hornet’s back…


…he was kind of asking for it.  There’s a struggle that takes only seconds, since the Hornet sends Axford to a couch with one sock to the jaw.  Axford then pulls out his revolver and starts shooting…and considering the distance between him and the Hornet, who’s trying to beat a hasty retreat out the front door, the fact that he misses him completely indicates why he was fortunate to get into another line of work (bodyguarding) instead of staying with the force.  The Hornet hits the light switch on his way out, and because his access to the fire escape has been cut off, he’s forced to go out the front entrance…


…where Clicker awaits with camera at the ready.  (“Hold it!  I think you’re going to like this picture!”)  The Hornet doubles back in the alley and orders Kato to drive with all deliberate speed, just as Axford comes out of the building and rushes up to where Clicker is waiting in the car.

AXFORD: The Hornet!  “Twas himself in there!  Did you see him?
CLICKER: Did I see him?  I’ll tell the world I did—I took his picture!
AXFORD: His picture?!!  Well, which way…

Axford’s voice trails off because he can hear the Black Beauty’s familiar buzzing in the distance…and he realizes that the Hornet has once again eluded him.

As for Clicker’s picture of G.H., The Sentinel’s staff is beside itself with excitement as the cast of characters—Jenks, Axford, Casey and editor Gunnigan (Joe Whitehead)—gather around Reid’s desk:

GUNNIGAN: Lemme see that picture of the Hornet!
JENKS: Clicker scooped the town!
REID: That’s great!  Gunnigan…see that Clicker gets a bonus…break up the front page to find room for that picture…
GUNNIGAN: I sure will…this’ll jump circulation plenty

Ah, Gunnigan…always the corporate suck-up.  You never disappoint.

AXFORD: And my story of the Hornet and his gang!
CASEY: Gang?  I thought the Hornet always worked alone

Axford assures Casey that had the Hornet been alone, he would have captured him…but that the Hornet also had three gorillas in his employ, so that stymied his efforts somewhat.  Winking at Gunnigan, Reid tells his editor to “put a rewrite man on Axford’s story.”


The scene then shifts to Monroe’s office, where Monroe and the usual gang of mooks are now joined by ace mechanic Pete (John Kelly) and ace…well, to be honest, I’m not sure what Joe Ogden (Arthur Loft) does in the organization since the Meadows garage is no longer in business.  But he keeps hanging around, so maybe he was kicked upstairs or something.

MONROE: This photograph of the Hornet gives us a chance to pile the whole thing right in his lap… (Switching on intercom) We’re ready, Chief…the men are waiting for your orders…

Despite his mad skills and ambition, Monroe is merely a functionary for the mysterious individual known only as “The Chief,” who communicates solely by intercom and who always seems to be available when Curtis presses that switch.

CHIEF: It’s necessary to take care of Lavonson at once before the police force him to talk…Andy and Pete will attend to this…Dean will convey these instructions to Lynch…if he’s interviewed, he’s to admit the existence of a protective association…and intimate that The Hornet is behind it…if you act at once, we can clear ourselves…start a manhunt for The Hornet from which he can’t escape!  That’s all…

“You’ve been listening to The Chief, a daily affirmation that all this stuff about the weed of crime bearing bitter fruit is a load of old cobblers.  And now a word from our sponsor...”

MONROE: You all understand what you’re to do?
ANDY: Leave Lavonson to us…
MONROE: Dean, you know what do to do…tell Lynch…

And…break!  Andy and Pete arrive at Lavonson’s apartment building, and inside, Lavonson nervously starts to pick up the telephone…stops suddenly…and then reaching into his pocket, pulls out the calling card the Green Hornet gave him.  He then walks over and locks the door to his apartment, and then walks back, picking up the phone again and dialing the police.

Unfortunately, Mr. Lavonson carelessly forgets that he’s left the same window from which the Hornet entered his apartment in the first place the previous night open, so his conversation with the proper authorities is going to be a bit short:

LAVONSON: Hello?  Police department?  This is Jay Lavonson… (Shots ring out)


“And this is Jay Lavonson being killed…”  He falls to the floor dead…and in his outstretched hand…


Now, you just know the Hornet is going to get all the blame for this…and he does, as the Police Commissioner (Stanley Andrews) triumphantly waves it in the face of Reid and the rest of The Sentinel employees in Reid’s office.

COMMISSIONER: It’s the calling card of The Green Hornet…there’s no doubt now who committed this murder…
REID: It certainly looks conclusive…
CASEY: I still don’t believe it…since when has The Hornet been working by daylight?
COMMISSIONER: I’ll ask him that when he’s brought in…we’re gonna get him if I have to make a house-to-house search!

Civil liberties, shmivil liberties!  Watching the Commissioner storm out of his office, Reid then turns to Jenks:

REID: Did you interview the cleaners and dyers on that list I gave you?
JENKS: Well, most of them…but they all deny any knowledge of a protection racket…I’ve left Lynch’s place until the last…
REID (thinking): Lynch…I’ll go talk to Mr. Lynch myself…

Since Mr. Lynch is in the cleaning and dying bidness, that means we must have plenty of stock footage of manly men and womanly women doing backbreaking laundry work…


 …and yet with all these employees, Lynch must do his own counter work when henchman Dean comes a-callin’.



LYNCH: What are you doing back here?
DEAN: The Sentinel’s got men out interviewing all the cleaning plants in town…
LYNCH: They haven’t been here
DEAN: Well, they will be…the boss wants to be sure you have your orders straight…
LYNCH: I’ve got ‘em all right…but I don’t like ‘em…it’ll leave me wide open to an attack from the Hornet!
DEAN: Oh, you’re safe enough…with a dragnet out for the Hornet he won’t dare come out of cover!

  
So Dean leaves Mr. Lynch’s humble establishment…and as he walks down the street, he passes by an office with a large window that reads “Lynch Real Estate Co.”  If we say, for the sake of argument, that both businesses are run by Lynch, the fact that he’s having to man his own counter at the laundry place is still kind of strange.  (Real estate and laundry are also kind of an odd combination…though not nearly as bizarre as a pair of businesses here in the Classic City on Broad Street run by a guy named “Gresham”—one of them is a disco and the other a used car lot.)  It is while walking past the real estate office that Dean spots Reid pulling up in his car, so he keeps an eye on our hero as he enters the humble laundry establishment of the real estate mogul.

REID: I’m Britt Reid of The Sentinel…we’re out to smash the protection racket and we need your corporation…
LYNCH: I was going to see you, Mr. Reid…I’ve been afraid to call the police in…ever since what happened to Lavonson…
REID: There is a protection racket…who collects your money?
LYNCH: My name won’t be mentioned?
REID: Only the names of the guilty will be published…
LYNCH: The Green Hornet makes the collections…
REID (trying to keep a straight face): You’re sure of that?
LYNCH: I’ve met him…face to face…
REID (shaking hands): Well, that’s fine, Mr. Lynch…I hope you don’t meet him again

Lynch has a big sh*t-eating grin on his face as Reid leaves, thinking he’s pulled one over on our hero.  If he could only see the size of the knife that’s about to be shoved into his back…

DEAN: Lynch didn’t like his orders…won’t destroy his plant…
MONROE: Well, maybe that can be arranged
DEAN: How about Lynch?
MONROE: I don’t think we’ll need Lynch any more…
DEAN: Suits me…

Man!  Talk about ruthless!  (That reminds me…I wonder where Ruth is?)  The scene then shifts to the apartment of Britt Reid, who appears to be stoked about a night of Horneting, judging by his getup.

REID: Did you phone Lynch?
KATO: Yes, Mr. Britt…as you ordered…

Notice that it’s never “asked” or “requested” or “suggested.”  Throw off your yoke of oppression, Kato…your debt has long been repaid.

KATO: I informed him anonymously that the police would raid his place tonight…
REID: Did he believe you?
KATO: He seemed frightened…I believe he is on his way to destroy his papers…
REID: We’d better be going!

At Lynch’s company, two shadowy figures have already beaten the Hornet and Kato there…it’s Dean and Corey, the all-American hoodlums.  “The gasoline is in the back,” Dean tells his partner…and I don’t think it’s because their car is running on fumes.  Sure enough, the two men go quickly to work pouring gasoline over every square foot of a backroom as the Hornet and Kato speed along toward the same destination, with G.H. telling Kato: “Faster, Kato!”  (As if a car that can do 200 mph is “poking along.”) 

Dean and Corey hear something in the next room and it turns out to be Lynch—who moves about his office rather stealthily even though he owns the place.  The two hoodlums go out the back way as Lynch heads toward a safe in his office.

DEAN: So Lynch meant to cross The Chief, huh?
COREY (pulling out his gun): Hmm?  He’s not going to cross anybody
DEAN (restraining Corey): You sap!  The place is filled with gasoline fumes…you want to blow it up?!!

“Yes.  Yes, I do.  I like fires.”  In his office, Lynch continues to ransack his own safe looking for papers when The Hornet suddenly appears.

LYNCH: What do you want?  Who are you?


Again with the calling card.

LYNCH: The Green Hornet!
HORNET: Yes, Lynch!  An old acquaintance, according to the papers…
LYNCH: They made me blame it on you!
HORNET: They?  Who are “they”?  Who do you take orders from?
LYNCH: Will I go free if I talk?
HORNET: I’m not here to bargain…I want the names of those racketeers…
LYNCH (reaching into the safe): I’ve got a list…here…


For reasons unexplained, that “list” looks remarkably like a gun.  Okay, maybe that’s because it is a gun.  Lynch thought he would be clever and try to catch the Hornet off guard.  The two men struggle for control of the weapon (“It’s no use—you haven’t a chance!”), and in the struggle (which spills into the gasoline-soaked backroom) the gun fires…

1 comment:

  1. they just leave henchman Dean lying on the ground

    The way they treat the badguy henchmen in these serials is alternately hilarious and terrifying. He's okay, indeed.

    kind of Lavonson’s fault for leaving it open, really

    Hey now, the script TOLD him to.

    ReplyDelete