By the time comic actress Alice Ghostley joined the cast of Mayberry
R.F.D. in today’s episode as Aunt Bee replacement Cousin Alice, she was
already a familiar face and TV veteran, having guest-starred on such chestnuts
as Car
54, Where are You? (in the hilarious episode “Love Finds Muldoon”), Naked
City, The Farmer’s Daughter, Get Smart, Hogan’s Heroes and The
Ghost and Mrs. Muir, to name just a few. She was a semi-regular on Jackie
Gleason’s American Scene Magazine variety program (in the “Arthur and
Agnes” sketches), and co-starred with William Daniels (as his mom) on the Get
Smart-like superhero spoof, Captain Nice. But she was probably best known on Bewitched
as the shy wallflower witch Esmeralda, a show she joined in the sitcom’s sixth
season (her character was kind of created to fill the void left by Marion
Lorne’s Aunt Clara when Lorne passed away in 1968) and continued to make
appearances on while also appearing as a cast member on R.F.D. (I should probably state for the record that
if you’re hoping Ghostley’s Cousin Alice fades away at inappropriate times like
her Bewitched
character…it doesn’t happen. I’ve
watched all the episodes, and was mildly disappointed she did not.)
So Ghostly had a considerable amount of cachet in the
industry by the time of her debut in “The New Housekeeper.” So much so that she rates this:
Yeah, Buddy Ray!
We’re talking Andy Griffith guest star credentials here. Look—it’s no
surprise that Ken Berry, in the role of
poor-but-honest-dirt-farmer-turned-town-council-head Sam Jones, gets top
billing on this program…and when Beatrice “Aunt Bee” Taylor (Francis Bavier)
was still tooling around Mayberry, it was only right that she be featured in
the opening credits as well (though there were occasions when she was credited
for shows in which she did not appear).
George Lindsey, who played village idiot Goober Pyle, was also
prominently listed in the show’s opening (even for episodes where he was MIA,
too)—which, again, considering the time he put in on The Andy Griffith Show,
seems only right.
So here’s the deal—Ghostley was able to leap frog over
Arlene Golonka (bakery doyenne Millie Swanson), Paul Hartman (fix-it savant
Emmett Clark, Jack Dodson (pedantic county clerk Howard Sprague) and Buddy
Foster (Mike the Idiot Boy). I’m curious
as to whether that ever caused any friction on the set.
But I’ve little time for idle show biz gossip—there’s big
doin’s in Mayberry as a construction crew works tirelessly to install a flag
pole in the town square. Supervising the
project are Howard and Goober—the latter making himself a regular nuisance to
the foreman on this project…
…hey! It’s our old
pal Ted Gehring, in his second of two R.F.D. appearances (the first one
being “Millie, the Secretary”). Good to
have the character veteran back for a brief bit in which his patience is
severely tried by you-know-who.
FOREMAN (shouting): All right,
Charlie…let it down easy…
GOOBER (also shouting): All right,
Charlie…let ‘er down easy…easy does it…
I realize, of course, that “Charlie” is one of the most
common names. But there’s a construction
guy named Charlie in both “The New Well” and “The Mayberry Road.” It’s got
to be the same person.
HOWARD: I guess you fellas see a lot
of these flagpoles go in, huh?
FOREMAN: Mmm… (Shouting again) All
right, Charlie…just a little bit to your left…
GOOBER (following suit): Little bit
to your left, Charlie!
HOWARD: This was forty-two feet
tall…and it’s two feet taller than the one at the library in Siler City …five feet taller
than the one at City Hall in Mt. Pilot …
“Be sure to be with us next week for another edition of Boring
Sh*t No One Cares About!”
FOREMAN: Okay, Charlie—hold it
right there!
GOOBER: Hold it right there,
Charlie…looks good…
FOREMAN: All right…here she goes…
GOOBER: Here she goes…
I was so hoping Gehring’s foreman would whip right around and
nail Goober with that beautiful line of Jack Warden’s from Used Cars: “What are you, a f**king parrot?”
FOREMAN (fed up with Goober the
mynah bird): Look, Mac…would you mind lettin’ me do it myself? I mean…it kinda
gives me a feelin’ of power, you
know?
GOOBER (sulky): I’m sorry…I was
just tryin’ to help… (Muttering to
Howard) Must’ve gotten up on the wrong side of the bed…
HOWARD: Well, he’s just trying to
do his job, Goober… (To the foreman)
Say, you know—we really appreciate you fellas getting this in for us…we’ve got
our big dedication ceremony scheduled for Saturday…
FOREMAN (glancing at his watch):
Well, it looks like it’s about time for lunch…
GOOBER: Me and Howard are in the
Honor Guard at the flag-raisin’…
(The foreman smiles weakly)
HOWARD: Big doin’s! Free eats and everything! You’re welcome to come and bring the family!
FOREMAN: Yeah, well, I’ll…I’ll sure
mention it to ‘em…
He said, knocking down townsfolk in his sprint back to the
truck. “Boy, it was lucky I was here to
help him get this flagpole in,” Goober says to Howard as if he actually had
some self-worth. He then points off-screen
as if he’s noticed something…and he has; for it’s our pretend farmer hero
himself, Sam Jones, walking up through the square and being greeted by his
idiot progeny, Mike.
SAM (to Howard and Goober): Hey,
guys…how’s it goin’?
HOWARD: Ah, it looks great…
SAM: Yeah…
HOWARD: Gonna be a big day…
SAM: Oh, yeah…
GOOBER: Yeah, it’s a shame Aunt Bee
couldn’t be here to see this…
SAM: Yeah…I got a letter from her,
and it looks like she’s going to be staying with her sister for quite a while…
And that, Aunt Bee devotees, is that.
HOWARD: Hmm…too bad, we’re sure
gonna miss her…
SAM: Yeah…
MIKE: Did Pa tell you who’s gonna
stay with us? Pa’s Cousin Alice! She’s an Army
sergeant!
HOWARD: Yeah, your Dad told us all
about her…say, did she get her discharge papers all right…?
SAM: Yeah, yeah…she’s all clear
now…you know, she was originally planning to stay in for the full thirty years,
but…they’ve got a pretty good pension after twenty, so…she decided to get out…
GOOBER: I never could figger out
why the Army wants them WACs…
I know someone I’d like to introduce to some WACs…preferably
from a strong stick. Sam announces that
he and Mike have to stop by and pick up Millie before meeting Cousin Alice at
the bus stop, so he’s a-moseyin’. “Tell
your cousin I got a saber from the Crimean War if she wants to see it,” Goober
informs him. Howard does the familiar
eye-rolling bit:
At the depot, Sam is worried about whether or not he’ll
recognize Alice …and Millie suggests
it might be the woman in uniform, demonstrating she’s the brains of the
outfit. Sam and Alice embrace warmly and
begin the family small talk.
SAM: Well, I hope so! (Laughing)
You know, I knew you right away—you haven’t changed a bit!
SAM: Here…I want you to meet my
son, Mike…
MIKE: Hi…do you have any medals?
Gotta love the social skills on that kid. “I like cheese!”
SAM (indicating Millie) Oh, and I’d
like you to meet a very dear friend of mine…
SAM: No…no…no…
Criminently…how many women have seen the inside of Sam’s barn since his wife passed on?
MILLIE: Millie Swanson…I come a
little later on the list…
Right after Melanie Haber…Audrey Farber…Susan
Underhill…Cousin Alice is a little red-faced at not having bought a program to
distinguish Millie from all of Sam’s former sexual conquests, but Sam helps her
save face by asking Mike to take Alice’s two carryon cases while he goes after
her duffel bag.
MIKE (holding up one of the cases):
What is this?
MILLIE: Oh!
MIKE: Did you ever ride a tank or anything?
“I like cheese!”
Millie laughs politely, because that’s pretty much all you can do when someone you’ve only known
for a couple of minutes starts to share way too much information. Having retrieved Alice ’s
luggage, Sam escorts Alice to where
he parked the car…and in a scene change, they’re crossing the threshold of Casa
del Jones.
SAM (at the front door): Oh,
Mike…you want to run those things up to Alice ’s room, please?
MIKE: Okay, Pa… (He exits upstairs)
SAM (setting down her suitcases):
Well…you go ahead and make yourself right at home…
“Well, except for the part about nothing growing in the
fields…”
SAM: Uh…you’re…not gonna miss the
Army too much, are ya?
ALICE: Oh…oh no, Sam…no, the Army
was good to me…it…it was really a
marvelous twenty years but…well, it’s time for me to settle down while I’m still young…
SAM: Well, it’s sure great for
us…you taking over for Aunt Bee…
SAM: Well, good! Good…
SAM: Oh…no…don’t worry about
that…another couple of days and you’re gonna feel right at home…
Gathering up the rest of her things, Sam asks Alice
what he should do with her trumpet and she tells him to put it anywhere…but
then asks him if they have a band in Mayberry.
When he responds that they don’t at the present time, Alice
is disappointed. “I’d hate to lose my
lip,” she observes.
SAM: Well, you …practice here!
SAM: Good…good… (He takes her
suitcases and starts toward the stairs)
SAM: Oh, I thought we’d just…uh, grab
a bite out tonight…and then maybe tomorrow you can go into town and do some
marketing and…we’ll get on a schedule…
You’ll get to sleep in, for one thing…because nothing
remotely resembling farm work ever goes on.
There is then a scene shift to Goober’s Gas—“Site of the Mayberry Dinosaur”—and we find the proprietor practicing his drill for the Honor Guard
with a broom when Alice pulls up in
Sam’s car.
GOOBER (noticing Alice ): Oh, hey!
GOOBER: Hey…Sam’s car! Aw…I bet you’re
Sam’s cousin…
“No more Mister Nice Guy/No more Mister Clean…”
GOOBER (extending his hand for a
shake): Uh…Goober Pyle…I own the station here…we probably met when we was kids…
“I remember you! You
were the one who used to eat all the paste!”
GOOBER (sheepishly): Oh…I’m in the
Honor Guard at the flagpole dedication…hey—you’ll appreciate this bein’ an Army man and all that…
Goober goes through his drill paces, counting off
“Two-three-four”…
GOOBER: What?
GOOBER: Well, actually…I said “five”
to myself when I snapped it back…
Sam apparently hasn’t told Alice that “four” is the highest
Goober can count.
GOOBER: It’s gonna be a big day…highlight of the ceremonies is
when they shoot off the cannon and me and Howard come marchin’ out… (He grins
stupidly) He’s the county clerk…he’s got
a nasal condition…
GOOBER: Naw…he’s got every nose
spray in the world…
Every episode…one laugh-out-loud moment.
GOOBER: Oh, you mean with the flag-raisin’…I don’t think so…things are
purty much in the works now…fill ‘er up?
Goober hands his broom to Alice
and walks over to the car, popping the hood.
GOOBER: It could be your spark
plugs…that’s them white things there…it might be somethin’ in the carburetor…that’s
that thing right there…
Her attempts to get in Goober’s good graces torpedoed
(though this isn’t necessarily a bad
thing), Grace continues on her errands, stopping by Mayberry’s friendly grocer
to do a little marketing. Two women have
exited from the store, one of whom needs no introduction—she’s resident
blue-blooded snob Clara Edwards (Hope Summers), in what will be her last
appearance on Mayberry R.F.D. I don’t
know the reason why, because I thought her character made a great
antagonist…and if it had anything to do with Aunt Bee’s departure that’s just
silly because the only R.F.D. episode they appear in
together is “The Mayberry Road.”
The woman beside her answers to “Grace,” and is played by
character great Helen Page Camp—Camp has been on the show before, notably as
the prickly Mrs. Corcoran in the classic “Driver Education.” Since her character in this episode is also
lacking in warmth, I don’t think it would be any stretch to assume that it’s
the same woman…particularly since Mrs. C wasn’t introduced by her first
name.
According to the always reliable IMDb, Camp was also in a
third R.F.D. episode, “Emmett’s Retirement.” She’s not officially credited in the episode,
and I think there’s a distinct possibility that she might have appeared in a
scene that got snipped for syndication since I’m reasonably sure I would have
spotted her upon viewing the show—she’s identified at IMDb as “Card player,” but
I don’t remember a card-playing scene in that installment, which just furthers
my cutting room floor suspicions. (Pure
speculation on my part, but perhaps Emmett’s decision to hang it up early was
disturbing a card game hosted by his wife Martha [Mary Lansing]—both of whom do
not appear this week, by the way.)
CLARA: Oh…good morning…
“School’s…out…for…summer/School’s…out…for…ever…”
CLARA: Oh, yes…well, welcome to Mayberry…I’m Clara Edwards…
“…and I’m not a
witch…really, I’m not…”
CLARA: …and this is Grace Johnson…
And there goes my Corcoran theory, scattered to the four
winds.
GRACE: Nice to meet you…
CLARA: Oh, yes…yes…
I’ll warn you away from the toilet tissue, though…that
Whipple guy inside doesn’t like it.
GRACE (chuckling): You’ve been in
the Army, haven’t you?
GRACE: My…what courage…
CLARA: Well…we hope to see you
soon…
GRACE: Oh, I’m sorry…tomorrow we’re
bridging…
CLARA: It’s our regular bridge day…
Bridge Day is a yearly spectacle held in Fayetteville ,
WV where they allow people to BASE jump
(parachute) or rappel off the New River
Gorge Bridge ,
the world’s longest steel single-span arch bridge. (You can probably tell where this joke was
headed.)
CLARA: …maybe you’d like to join
us?
GRACE: Oh…
GRACE: Poker?
GRACE: Well, I really don’t…
CLARA: Possibly…some other time… (To Grace) Grace, we
really must run now…
The politest goodbyes these two biddies can muster are
offered up to Alice , but it’s
pretty obvious her many years in the armed services are rapidly making her a
pariah in Mayberry. Que lastima! Well, the scene then shifts to the Jones
family kitchen, formerly the bailiwick of the dearly departed Aunt Bee. Sam comes in with a pair of trousers that
have been transformed into cardboard because Alice
went a little heavy on the starch—you can take the girl out of the Army,
but…well, you know. I kind of chuckled
at this sight gag because it reminds me of a similar one in a Three Stooges
comedy, Movie Maniacs (1935).
SAM: Of course…of course…
SAM: Yeah… (After a pause) Well,
look—there’s a…big meeting tomorrow at the council office on that flagpole
dedication? Be a lot of people there…why
don’t you stop by?
SAM: Yeah! Give you a chance to meet everybody…
And regret it till the end of your days afterward. Alice
goes back to her kitchening, and through the back door comes Idiot Boy, who
expresses an interest in what Alice
has cooking on the stove.
MIKE: Fixing supper?
MIKE: I’m not sure…Pa’s been doing the cooking…
MIKE: It’s been kinda rough since
Aunt Bee left… (Alice nods) Uh…what’s that?
The Army regulars, of course, refer to it by its charming
nom de cuisine, “Shit on a shingle.”
MIKE: Creamed chipped beef on
toast?
ALICE: Yes…you see, you take some
milk…and you add a little flour for thickening…and then you add some salt…and
some dried beef…then you cook it over a low flame and pour it over a good ol’
piece of white toast and…well…well, it’s really swell…
MIKE: Any dessert?
Tune in next week for another episode of Throwdown
with Alice Cooper—only on The Food Network!
MIKE: Rice and raisins?
MIKE: Uh…no chocolate marshmallow
or butterscotch cake?
What do you think this is, kid—Morelli’s? You know…I almost wish they had made Alice ’s
character a little saltier, that her response would be something like:
“Chocolate marshmallow cake? Listen, you
little (expletive deleted)…I did not watch my buddies die face down in the muck
so that you could stuff your (obscene gerund) face with (another obscene
gerund) chocolate marshmallow cake!”
Alice is certainly no fool—she can see that the menu doesn’t
measure up to the specifications of the sophisticated palate of Michael Jones,
Esquire…so she tells the little mook she’ll try but he responds that she should
probably stick to “rice and raisins.”
So…now it’s time for that portion of the program where they have a big
committee meeting in the council office—and in attendance are Sam and Alice,
along with Clara, Grace, Millie, Howard and Mayberry’s wily and parsimonious
drugstore proprietor Elmo, played by Vince Barnett. Oh, and two other individuals who will remain
nameless and faceless because…let’s be honest…you’ll probably never see these
people ever on the show again.
SAM: …well, I guess that takes care
of everything as far as the ceremony itself is concerned…
CLARA: It should be glorious!
SAM: Yeah…
ELMO: What about the refreshments?
CLARA: Uh…Grace and I have planned
two hundred finger sandwiches…assorted…
“Both little boy and little girl…”
GRACE: And a fruit punch…something simple but stimulating…
“My creamed chipped beef on toast is the talk of five continents…”
CLARA: Well…thank you, Alice …but there’s no problem…
ELMO: Yeah…
SAM: Oh, Elmo—how about the seating
arrangements? The chairs and everything…
ELMO: Under control, Sam…
MILLIE: I bought the decorations
for the bandstand…it should be lovely…
“And my rice and raisins?
C’est magnifique!”
ELMO: I don’t know where…everything
seems to be in good shape…
SAM: Oh…uh…Howard? How’s the Honor Guard coming?
HOWARD: Oh…fine, fine…Tommy
Winterhalter’s going to be the bugler…he’ll be in his scout uniform, and then
Goober and I are going to be in revolutionary
war outfits…
“…because our lederhosen won’t be back from the cleaners in
time.”
CLARA: Now…about the theme cake…uh, Mrs. Carter is going to
bake that, isn’t she?
MILLIE: Mrs. Carter? She went out of town…
GRACE: Good heavens! We were counting on her!
CLARA: Of course! And I don’t know where we’ll find time to bake a cake…
The first time I watched this episode, I shouted out: “Did
everybody collectively forget that Millie works in a bakery?” Well, scribes Dick
Bensfield and Perry Grant apparently did, because this cake crisis has
essentially been created to guilt Alice
into taking on the assignment even though she hasn’t progressed much beyond
rice and raisins. (The camera even goes
in for a close-up, as she opens her mouth to speak and then struggles as to
whether she should say something.)
There’s quite a bit of banter back and forth about this (eventually Sam
asks “Why don’t you buy one?” which is kind of in keeping with the
Millie-bakery concept, but Clara vetoes this with “only as a last resort”) and
then Alice finds the nerve to say:
GRACE: Alice ! Could you?
“You people like rice and raisin cake, right?”
CLARA: Why, that’s very sweet, Alice …but you do understand that it’s the theme
cake…and that means that it has to be very dramatic…
CLARA: Yes…it probably should be a three-tiered cake…possibly with red,
white and blue icing…and a decoration
on top consistent with the flag-raising…possibly a flag…or an eagle…or the Statue of Liberty! Something like that! Do you think you can handle that, Alice ?
I’m surprised Alice ’s
response wasn’t “Piece of cake!” Oh, and
I love the face Sam makes as Clara describes what shape the theme cake should
take. But no, she assures Clara that she
has the matter in hand and although you would think Sam would be monitoring
this to the point where he would interject with “Maybe we should just order a
Number 35 from Boysinger’s” he dismisses the meeting, telling all assembled
that if everyone does their jobs it will be a splendid time for all.
Back from shilling for General Foods, we find Alice in the
Jones kitchen, being counseled by Sam’s cretinous son who for some odd reason
wields a broom throughout this exercise, as if he were some doofus who works at
a gas station practicing for the Honor…um…let’s move on, shall we?
MIKE: I thought you said you didn’t
know how to bake?
MIKE: Oh…
So the above screen capture shows Alice ’s
progress with the theme cake. Please do
not laugh and point, as it will embarrass her.
Actually, since the top tier is a little lopsided, she resorts to a
little ingenuity…
…she breaks out the cookie jar and slides a few cookies
underneath. I did not laugh at this,
because that would actually be something I
would do if necessary. A few seconds of screen
time later and…
…viola! The cake, she
is done! Mike comes in and surveys Alice ’s
handiwork. “Well—how does it look?” she
asks a question she knows the answer to.
“I…guess it’ll
taste good,” he responds unconvincingly, backing away from the dessert as if it
were radioactive.
Poor Alice . In a funk because she’s flunked Home Ec, it’s
up to the Sage of Mayberry to sit her straight.
SAM: Aw…come on, Alice …we have to go down there and help get things ready…
SAM: Look…would you just…forget about that cake—it’s not that serious!
So they won’t have a theme
cake…
SAM: Oh…
SAM: Look…Alice…I…I think you’re
making much too much out of this thing…
SAM: Oh, nonsense…
SAM: Well…maybe you’ll change your
mind and come down later…
You know, with ineffectual Sam giving advice to everyone in
Mayberry—I’m surprised the suicide rate in that town isn’t three times the
national average. As for Alice …well,
this would be a good time to disappear providing she had the powers of an
Esmeralda.
Just looking at the above screen cap you know this clambake
is going to be one of those affairs where you shift uncomfortably in your seat,
your clothes clinging to you in the heat and you wishing the damn thing was
over already. Clara, Grace and Millie
are futzing around the tables, arranging the refreshments:
MILLIE: Well, where do you want
Wilma’s secret roses beet surprise?
GRACE: Just put it back there…nobody ever eats it…
SAM (approaching the women):
Uh…hello, ladies…
CLARA: Hello, Sam…where’s Alice ?
SAM: Uh…well, that’s what I wanted
to explain to you, Clara…
Listen to how smoothly Sam alibis for the missing cake. Truly inspired.
CLARA: You don’t mean that she
didn’t make the cake?
SAM: Oh, no…well…yes…she made the cake, all right…yeah…she baked
the cake…three tiers…red, white and blue and everything…but…uh…well, you see,
Alice is kind of a perfectionist…
GRACE: Go on…
SAM: Well, the…the cake didn’t turn
out quite as well as she thought it should, so she…well…she dropped it…and…it was ruined…
“And then Mike ate the remains. Oh, it was a terrible sight to behold.”
CLARA: I would think that if she
didn’t know how to bake, she
shouldn’t have offered!
GRACE: After all, the theme cake was the focal point of our
whole table!
MILLIE: Well…what about using
Wilma’s secret…beet surprise?
Millie…darlin’…you
work in a bakery!
“Very disappointing…very disappointing,” crows Clara, but
they’ll soon have bigger fish to fry.
Goober and Howard rush in, clad in what can only be their underwear, and
they have a boy dressed in a scout uniform with them. Maybe I don’t want to know what this is
about…
GOOBER: Where’s the first aid
kit? Where’s the first aid kit?
SAM: What happened?
HOWARD: Willie got hit in the mouth
playing baseball…
I’ve run the scene over several times, and it definitely
sounds to me as if Howard is calling the kid “Willie” when earlier it was
established that his name was “Tommy.” (Though it could be my forty-nine-year-old ears, too.) I guess it doesn’t matter, because Sam
reverts back to calling him “Tommy”…and I don’t want to say anything before the
facts are in, but the injury above that kid’s lip looks as if someone hit him
with something other than a baseball. (I
hear his old man drinks.)
SAM: Let me have a look, Tommy…let
me see it…well…now…that doesn’t look too
bad…
GOOBER: Too bad? It couldn’t be worse—that’s his buglin’
lip!
HOWARD: Yeah! What if he can’t play the bugle when we run
the flag up the pole?
SAM: Oh…
GOOBER (to Howard): Get some
ice…get some ice!
(Howard runs over to the punch bowl
and grabs a handful of ice)
GRACE: Get your hands out of my punch!
HOWARD: This is an emergency!
GOOBER (to Tommy): What kind of kid
are you, out playin’ baseball?
(Howard arrives with the ice, and
Sam starts to apply it to the kid’s lip)
HOWARD: Don’t move that lip!
GOOBER: I knew somethin’ was gonna
happen…
SAM: Tommy…can you blow out of the
side of your mouth?
TOMMY: I don’t think so…
HOWARD: Don’t move that lip!
GOOBER: We might as well cancel everything…highlight of the whole
ceremony, and we gotta march out there without a bugle call!
MILLIE: Well, can’t we get somebody
else?
Millie, why aren’t you back at the bakery for that theme
cake? Chop chop! “Oh, yeah…sure…Mr. Wiggins can blow to the colors on his violin,” says
Howard sarcastically. But Sam has a
cunning plan—so cunning you can put a tail on it and call it a weasel. He excuses himself, and says he’ll be right
back.
You’re already where you need to be in the narrative—Sam
presses Alice into service to be
the Boogie Woogie Bugle Gal of Company B.
I did want to direct your attention to this, first:
Elmo was put in charge of firing the cannon. (I was expecting a Fort Courage guard turret to come crashing down afterward.) Then
Sam gives his cousin a familial hug and says: “Welcome to
Mayberry, Alice.” And the less cynical
among us kind of tear up at some honest sentiment.
Most of the coda on this one is taken up by a very nice
harmony version of A Little Street (Where
Old Friends Meet), sung by Berry (nice to know he can strum something other than Carolina Moon) and Ghostley—Alice demonstrating
she’s no slouch when it comes to carrying a tune. (Good luck finding it on YouTube—the guy who
posted those R.F.D. episodes earlier had his account terminated “due to
multiple third-party notifications of copyright infringement from
claimant.”) When they’re finished, Alice
and Sam heft a couple of quarts of lemonade brought to them by Mike the Idiot
Boy, with Sam asking his cousin “And you really feel at home now?”
“Like I’ve lived here all my life,” she answers
cheerfully. I laughed at this, because this
is pretty much the modus operandi with Mayberry—it’s possible to be a “veteran”
even after joining R.F.D. a season or two earlier.
If you look at the listing of R.F.D. episodes under
Alice Ghostley’s name at the IMDb…you’ll find her credited with two
appearances. Now—don’t start clutching
your pearls as you make your way to the fainting couch simply because the
Internet’s movie and TV data source is once again horribly, horribly wrong. Wikipedia credits Ghostley with fourteen
shows, but the only way to really solve this thing is by using the
authoritative measuring power of Thrilling
Days of Yesteryear’s latest invention, the Alice-o-Meter. (Yes, this is the Bee-o-Meter…it just has a new name. You try selling this machine on eBay.) So with this episode, we tally one Alice
appearance on the series. Will we chalk
up another one next week? There’s only
one way to find out—join us for “All for Charity,” a let’s-put-on-a-show opus
featuring the terpsichorean skills of Paul Hartman, an appearance from the
lovable “Fishface,” and a cameo from a future Academy Award-winning
actress. Be there! Aloha!
4 comments:
“I like cheese!”
HA!
Oh, boy, these are gonna be hard to get through, and I'm only reading the recaps, not watching the shows like you are. Alice Ghostly is not one of my favorite people; I'm not keen on the Ghostlys or the Thelma Ritters or the Edna Mae Olivers of the thespian community.
As for "every woman can bake a cake" nonsense, to that I say "PFFFFT."
Alice Ghostly is not one of my favorite people; I'm not keen on the Ghostlys or the Thelma Ritters or the Edna Mae Olivers of the thespian community.
I mentioned it in the first paragraph, but there's a Car 54, Where are You? episode Ghostley guested on ("Love Finds Muldoon") that I think may be the funniest thing I've ever seen her do. Other than that, I agree with you -- she's kind of an acquired taste; she certainly wasn't Marion Lorne (which might be a little unfair, because so few people could ever hope to be) and the only other thing I vividly remember her from is Designing Women, which I didn't care for at all. I'm not entirely certain what the R.F.D. folks thought she was going to bring to the table nor can I figure out why she agreed to appear on the show (other than the whole paying-the-rent thing) when it already had the stink of death.
But not liking Thelma Ritter...kiddo, we have to talk.
I know, I know. Everyone disagrees with me on Thelma Ritter. I just have a very low tolerance for people who play to the same character constantly, or who have such a limited performance range.
I like her well enough in Pickup on South Street, but The Mating Season just pushed me over the edge. It was probably the 11th Ritter film I'd seen, so to be fair, I gave her a heck of a chance before deciding I was no fan.
I wonder if Alice did her own bugle/trumpet playin', or was it dubbed in by somebody else? Maybe somebody knows.
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